Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Merry (not yet ready to declare war on) Christmas

Sad News and Glad News

First, Joan’s mother, Florence Parrella, died in June after a very long illness.   She had suffered, spending the better part of fifteen years in bed and a wheelchair.  We will hold onto memories of her making cookies and Italian meatballs with her grandchildren.  She was a patient, loving grandmother. She would have been ninety this month.

Then, in early October, my father, Ernest Schlieben, died.  He departed as he had lived his 96 years, on his own terms.  In late August, after an operation to repair a perforated ulcer, he came down with pneumonia and, knowing the end was near, insisted on being home.  We arranged for hospice care.  He voluntarily stopped eating and drinking and, remarkably, survived 26 days.  My brother Dan and I spent the entire time with him in Ewing, NJ (I made two short visits home) and brothers George and Brooks, who lived nearby, relieved us almost daily.  The month of September gave the four of us a chance to spend time together as adults (that doesn’t happen often these days) and it was time well spent.  I like to think that that was part of Ernie’s plan; that and teaching us that, like living, dying can be faced fearlessly.  Characteristically, right up to the end he was reminding us to empty the dehumidifier in the basement, and, oh yes, don’t forget there are quarters in a bowl in the kitchen.

In between these two events, on August 17th, our granddaughter, Madeleine Paige Schlieben, was born to Roy and Jenn in Bangkok.  Of course, without prejudice, I can say that she is the most beautiful grandchild ever.  Jenn and Roy (mostly Jenn) have been amazingly good at posting blogs and photos of Maddie’s first four months.  We look forward to seeing her in person when Jenn, Roy and Maddie arrive home on December 16th.  They will be home for three weeks.  I was able to share photos and a short video with Ernie before he died.  It might have been the last time he was able to smile; “Life goes on…” he whispered.

More glad tidings:  I am delighted to report that Jess and Brendan Haley will be married on July 14th.  We had an engagement party here in June at which time I was tempted to call Judge Runyon down the street to come by and save us a bundle by marrying them on the spot!   (Like all good thoughts, this one occurred to me about six hours after the party was over.) Brendan’s Design/Build business is going very well and Jess will finish up her Masters thesis in May at BAC.  Hooray!

This year marks the fifth year of our retirement.  We had hoped to travel more this year but events forced us to postpone travel until this coming spring.  We did manage a long weekend in Cooperstown in April, but that was about it.

Joan and I are well, although it would be disingenuous to imply that Joan’s Parkinson’s hasn’t made her life difficult.  She goes to Ti Chi for Balance once a week and to a monthly support group, and she takes long walks almost daily, so she gets high marks for soldiering on.  She does not recommend it, though.

We have been taking care of Suki, Jenn and Roy’s dog, since May.  The heat and humidity of Bangkok weren’t Suki’s thing and she is much more at home hunting chipmunks at Camp New Hampshire.  We managed to keep a tradition alive by vacationing at Silver Bay again this year.  We have gone to Silver Bay every year since Roy was a year old, so it has much the feel of home away from home.

Well, that about does it for another year.  We wish you all a very Happy New Year!